


Without Sound of Bells

by commas_and_ampersands



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Character Study, Gen, Sailor Moon SuperS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-26
Updated: 2018-11-26
Packaged: 2019-08-30 01:18:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16755091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/commas_and_ampersands/pseuds/commas_and_ampersands
Summary: He told you to ring the bell whenever you needed him.





	Without Sound of Bells

**Author's Note:**

> Written August 2010; some revisions November 2017. Title taken from "At Melville's Tomb" by Hart Crane.

He told you to ring the bell whenever you needed him.  Whenever you were in trouble, you could pray, hold the carillon aloft, and he would fly to you from nowhere.  He would give you the power you needed to defeat the evil.  
  
You are more grateful than you can say for his help.  Each time he appears is an affirmation of how he cares for you, reassurance that he is safe.  Without him, you'd be lost and beaten, dead in a town overrun by circus freaks.  
  
You're grateful, but sometimes you still feel weak.  A soldier needing saving.  You wanted to be like the Sailor Moon from your father's bedtime stories - the girl warrior who could do anything.  You never wanted to be like the Sailor Moon you've come to know, who needs help so often, who is strong but so often in need of saving.  
  
You're grateful, you feel weak, and you're guilty of pride.  Or shame.  Or both at once.  It's all muddled inside fear for yourself and for him.  
  
Sometimes you want to call him just to see him.  So that you can hold him in the light of day, not just the rainbow twilight of your dreams or the fevered pitch of battle.  You want to see his eyes up close and without fear of losing him. Sometimes you just need a friend, and despite the fact that you have many, there are none like him.  
  
But you don't call him.  He wouldn't like you to.  
  
So you settle for dreams and war - half forgetting one and trying to forget the other.  You settle for praying, holding the carillon aloft, and sounding the bells that will carry him to your side.  
  
And every time - every  _single_  time - you fear he will not come.  You have loved and lost too much to simply have faith.  
  
This is the one thing he asks of you.  
  
This is the one thing you cannot give him.


End file.
